Jennie Sjursen 0:00
We just found out our child has dyslexia. Should we tell them? Well, telling them make things worse for them, or better. I don't want to label them. I'm really not sure how to handle this.
Jennie Sjursen 0:14
I'm Jenny Sjursen, ex special educator turned dyslexia interventionist. It wasn't so long ago that I too, was overwhelmed by balanced literacy versus structured literacy, education speak, and everything in between. Fast forward after many, many hours of self driven education. And you'll see I've built a thriving dyslexia practice helping students from ages six to 18. My specialties, working with a quote unquote difficult almost always to the student, and breaking down the complexities of dyslexic to everyday language strategies and action steps.
Jennie Sjursen 0:55
Before we dive in two quick housekeeping items. In our last episode, I said this one would feature a guest who not only is dyslexic, but also the daughter of one dyslexic, and mother to another. Unfortunately, the flight cancellation issues around the holidays has forced us to postpone that episode. We had multiple flights canceled on us and I wasn't able to fly out or meet up with our guest. I'll keep you updated on when we think this episode will be rescheduled.
Jennie Sjursen 1:27
Also, a quick reminder, we are officially in IEP season. To help you out we've put together a 12 questions to ask at a dyslexia IEP meeting with answers, podcast and matching PDF we've linked to both in our show notes below. Go ahead, hit pause, bookmark the podcast and grab a copy of the PDF will wait for you.
Jennie Sjursen 1:51
Okay, going through the evaluation and identification process is full of ups and downs. relief that you finally know why your child is struggling heartache for what they're going through, and angst over whether or not you should tell them they're dyslexic I emphatically believe you should have a discussion with your child and tell them they have dyslexia and what that means for them. Here's the thing, they already know they're struggling. depending on their age, they can sense that they're different from others in their class, their anxiety levels around reading in school could be ratcheting up, and they can be questioning their overall self worth and intelligence. For your child finding out they have dyslexia and how their brains work is often a relief. Things start falling into place for them, they start to understand why things have been so hard for them. And they get a better sense of themselves and how to create and use strategies that work for them. Not telling them can have a lasting effect on their worldview and self esteem.
Jennie Sjursen 2:58
Okay, I'm going to get a little personal. I'm not shy in sharing that I have ADHD. But I wasn't diagnosed until I was an adult. When I found out I was relieved, I'm not crazy, mad so mad that it had taken so long to find out. And really, really sad. All that wasted time. If only I had known, what could I have accomplished with the correct supports and strategies? Middle School was very difficult for me. I really wish I had known before then. I don't want any child to experience what I did. So yes, without a doubt, tell your child.
Jennie Sjursen 3:41
Okay, so what's the best way to tell your child Don't just bring it on them, find a place where they feel safe, it could be snuggled up on the couch or one on one time in the car. Perhaps you ask them if they remember how they met with a person. And they did all those tasks. That person that was going to help everyone figure out how to help them better with school. Next, you can tell them that you now have a really good idea of what's going on. They have something called dyslexia. Then go into a basic explanation of dyslexia and how it affects them. You do not need to get all precise and in depth on this. Unless of course they are to E and they want need to know everything. Do use the word dyslexia and encourage them to use it. When I was diagnosed with ADHD, I was warned to not tell anyone, as it may affect how my coworkers perceived me and worked with me. I don't buy into that. In fact, it is one of the main reasons why I share my experiences with my students. They appreciate knowing they're not the only one with these kinds of experiences and feelings. Let your child know that dyslexia is pretty common, and that there's probably at least one One to two other people in their class who also have dyslexia. Next, I would explain to them that while dyslexia isn't something you can outgrow school, and possibly an outside service provider, is going to help them learn the way their brains need to learn and teach them strategies they can use in and outside of school now is when I'd slide in a little hard truth, the tasks they need to do and the strategies they're going to learn, are going to take work can be hard, and may take time, but it will get easier over time, and you will be there with them every step of the way.
Jennie Sjursen 5:42
At this point, I would also let them know that dyslexia doesn't limit their future or dreams. Their path to getting there may look different than other people's, but it's still entirely doable. The one thing I would not say is, it's okay, you can't read. Good, it's so many other things. While your intentions may be good, what they hear and internalize is, I'm stupid. I can't read. We don't know who they may grow into. And we don't want to unintentionally lower their expectations. Let them grow into themselves and who they're meant to be. If you have any further questions about dyslexia, and how to talk to your child about it, please feel free to sneak into my inbox. Until next time, bye bye.
Jennie Sjursen 6:38
I hope you enjoyed this episode of literacy untangled if you love this episode as much as I did, head on over and rate and subscribe so you never miss an episode. If you want to continue the conversation or share your takeaways, head on over to our Instagram at literacy, untangle, and comment on your favorite part. I can't wait to hang out with you again soon. Bye.
